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The first time we talked on the chat, I think it was the typical conversation, description, tastes, music, food, experiences and a few feverish notes hehe. But as almost always happened to me, never I have no illusions to people who connect to the chat. First, because they are looking for what I said or second are seeking someone with web camera (I have none) to have sexual fun for a while (very flashy but it is still something very fleeting and only serves to placate the hormones that are sometimes disturbed). For these reasons I thought it was going to keep going as usual. Also note that on MSN, my contacts, reached the record figure of 325, of which I have spoken with each of them a first time, but then they disappeared like ghosts and never find them again online, to be reduced to about 15 with whom they regularly keep a conversation. Therefore Oskar thought I still dressed in the same line routine that I always carry my relationship with my internet acquaintances. The next day, at the same time again and already logged Oskar were talking about things less trivial: their studies, their families, their aspirations, their future, their love affair between hetero-bis-homosexual and its belief that it was defined as a man who passionately sought and wanted to be with men (what a coincidence) against the traditional precepts of our families. This is how we both were undressing one another, in all the frustrations and repressed desires and found we had many things in common. Of course, that in a long chat conversation is much to discover and analyze, so we met the next day at the same time, to continue to develop our scheme of mutual understanding. The day came and spent the time and Oskar, showed no signs of life. Not connected, did not comment, said nothing. I was right, seeing that again, that he had died in the attempt. What to do? What thinking? How to react? Played only wait until the next day or just save it as a souvenir in an envelope and throw it into oblivion.

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never reach me think that the internet would be of much use in my knowledge of life and strengthening my habits and tendencies. When I agreed for the first time could not understand how to use it on my own behalf. Was limited only to see some of my homework and that other concerns at that time had, but I could not to transcend beyond what I could think at that time. And it was not start listening to my friends at school about what they did for internet and a few days to understand why many people were hooked on this communication system. Of my colleagues learned that the Internet could be watching porn, but porn all dimensions, sizes and classes. So what my imagination could not fit, was on the internet. Thousands of categories to describe what people want to do sexually, half met. The mail, MSN, chat seemed like the latest wonder. The music and video programs. Knowing that you could download popular songs or movies of recent Release on the card. Being able to read newspapers or listen to the radio from remote locations with music selections of the best quality. But certainly what struck me most was the internet to find a corner to fully understand the expression of my sexuality: I read the first blogs, written by young people, who experienced exactly the same as me, in terms of preferences, ie as I had hundreds of people who felt the same boiling house their hormones. I read, too, erotic stories that I showed in all its glory sex between persons of the same gender. I learned and became convinced that the act of masturbation, did not cause insanity, impotence or physical signs that could point me to the society, who was a fervent practitioner of this "discipline." For the first time I saw an erect penis, which immediately took me to run, "discipline" named above. I found many pages, in which there was discussion forums about all our problems preteen-sexconfundida and got my first light of acceptance of my condition. I was definitely a wonder to let me understand a lot, much of what happened to me. Before starting this blog, I attempted to write a few love stories and other erotic tendency, depicting all of my fantasies with my friends of course or near my family, but for obvious reasons, always ended in the ashes, to leave no trace of their existence and prevent them falling into hands that could be used to discover the great veil that covered my in terms of my personality and my tastes. By following this path of Internet users happy, I started to find people like me who were searching for explanations to our confused and contradictory situation. Some, with very clear intentions for sexual favors, harvested from my limited experience, others are not that kind of interest, but I do not inspire confidence. I never could understand why someone with whom to converts the first time now, we are asking for the number of your phone or mobile home, these people immediately and will produce insecurity me lose confidence. Suddenly, and as a result of these writings, came a person who was interested (like many others, I have written and some with which we could talk through MSN, from as far afield as Mexico, Guatemala, Honduras, Argentina, USA , Canada, Spain, Australia and also from here in Colombia) and started talking one afternoon less than 20 days. His name is Oskar is 17, also from Bogotá and has had the same experiences I've had with men (virtually no haha) and mental clarity impressive entry that radiates me security and satisfaction and peace of mind for our gay dual conch in our thoughts.